Let’s talk ethics. You may realize at this point that the stages are a powerful part of our psychological reality. Your understanding of the stages is a major boost to your understanding of yourself, and the people around you. The ability to move yourself to the optimal stage is a superpower that few around you may have. That being said, you will also have the ability to move others into specific stages at will.
DO NOT MOVE PEOPLE BETWEEN STAGES WITHOUT THEIR AWARENESS AND PERMISSION.
Even if you think you are doing them a favor by moving them from, for example, Stage Three (needs) to Stage Four (others), you may be doing harm. In this example, they are in Stage Three because they have unmet needs. If their needs are not addressed, they will soon enough be pulled back to Stage Three to address them. This thwarts you’re efforts are best, and causes them to feel miserable and desperate at worst.
Temporary shifts are reasonable, IF they are aware of what you are doing. So be sure to start by saying something like: “First we are going to do a quick exercise to get in the right mindset for this project/meeting. OK?” Give them a chance to bow out. If you need to be in Stage Three, Five or Seven for the day, please warn them, make it clear, and have a plan to return them to a better stage as soon as you are done with your work.
Similarly, it is always better to shift people FORWARD, rather than backwards. They have likely been through a lot of years, experiences and possibly effort to get to where they are. They would not want you to undo all of that.
Using your understanding of the stages to better connect with the people around you is entirely ethical and encouraged! Your colleagues, employees, customers and others are all longing to be understood. Please do use your knowledge for connection. Connection, in turn, forwards careers and businesses alike.
When in doubt, don’t be a jerk. Ask yourself what YOU would want, and what would be both kind and optimal for the business.
