We have all heard that perfect is the enemy of good enough. But our perfectionist tendencies still preside over our daily lives, body image, work projects, and everything between. Why? Because …
(1) Good enough does not sound at all exciting. It sounds like settling for less or not caring, or giving up in some way, and
(2) You think perfect exists so you go for it.
We often define perfect as a state of being where something (your work project, your relationship, your body, etc) is completely optimized. The project could not possibly be improved, your body could not have less fat or more muscle, that dish you made could not taste better. However, perfect, by that definition, is unattainable. There will always be something you can improve. As soon as you think it is perfect, you scrutinize and find just one more thing that could be better. Perfection, therefore, is a comparison of the way things are to some imaginary FINAL way it could be. Perfect is a final destination that cannot be reached. It causes us to be dissatisfied. It’s like being on an amazing road trip to the magical land of Nirvana only to compare each moment to the imaginary destination and grumble that this beautiful forest you stopped to take a break in is just not nirvana and therefore it just sucks. You miss the opportunity for amazing.
Who wants a life that is “good enough?” Not me! I am a big fan of optimizing every aspect of my life. I don’t just want good enough, I want amazing. Amazing is not perfect. Prefect is a mythical destination. Amazing is a state of being here and now.
Perfect is comparing the current state of things to an unattainable end goal. Amazing, on the other hand, is comparing the current state of things to a set of pre-determined criteria. For example, let’s suppose that you want to create a presentation to pitch a business idea for funding. If you seek the perfect presentation, you will be in a constant state of changing and adding and subtracting that never ends. Ultimately, no one will ever see it and your ideas will never become reality. What if you instead set criteria ahead of time for what an amazing pitch looks like. You decide ahead of time the topics it should cover, the feel of it, the attitude, the colors, etc. You do your research so that you know the types of questions it should answer. Then you can put your editing cycles into improving the specific language that you use within that rubric of amazing. You craft an amazing pitch for an amazing idea and start spreading your ideas to the world.
Suppose you have body goals. Set them ahead of time and make them attainable (challenging but not impossible). Seek continual improvement towards those specific goals. When you get there, celebrate your awesomeness, instead of criticizing new flaws.
That’s the thing – Amazing is about being here and now, appreciating your efforts towards pre-set goals instead of criticizing flaws or comparing to some unattainable end destination.
Tomorrow morning, step outside and see that it is amazing – sun shining, or a peaceful rain, birds chirping, green trees. Don’t focus on the construction noise far away and out of your control, or a mosquito or two, or your neighbor’s AC unit being noisy. See that, on a scale from sucks to perfect, this day is amazing.
Amazing is attainable. The journey from sucks to OK to good to great to amazing, is by itself something to celebrate. Take action to optimize your self and your life, but seek to make it amazing, specifically defined. The reality is that anything can be better, and it can always be worse.
Think of it as a scale…
HELL … Sucks … Meh … OK … Good … Great … Amazing … PERFECT
Absolute hell and absolute perfection cannot be attained. While we should not settle for any aspect of our lives to be sucky, meh, OK or even just good, we should celebrate the journey that takes us to a destination of amazing. Choose to recognize and credit how far you have come and choose to recognize when you have hit your definition of amazing. Be here and now, not comparing to some nonexistent future.
What specific goals do you have that you are working towards?… Can you appreciate what is good, great and amazing about your situation right now? Can you celebrate your action and your journey towards the goal?
