We get so busy. Sometimes it pays to take a little time and focus on each other. For most couples, that means maybe going out to dinner, or watching a movie. But you can be together, sharing a meal or a movie and never actually connect. So here are some games to play that will boost your connection via compassion and love. Unlike other games, these can be played by just one of you and still have a good effect. So if your partner is not necessarily into relationship building, you can initiate many of these activities and still get the benefit for both of you.
Eye Gazing – when your partner speaks, or even when they are not speaking, look them in the eyes. Look deeply into their eyes, like the pupil is the window to the soul. Try to see their soul. This can feel very intense. You will discover that every human on this plant is preprogrammed to respond to this kind of fully concentrated eye contact. If they are uncomfortable with someone seeing their truth, they will break gaze quickly. This could be because they don’t want you to see the truth if their soul, or it could be simply that they feel unworthy of that kind of connection. Obviously, don’t do this for too long with strangers, or it will come off as creepy and invasive. Yes, look people in the eyes when you meet them and when you speak with them. But don’t hold the gaze for too long or you will make them uncomfortable. It takes a little trust to allow someone to see your full truth. Start with short gazes during conversations and work your way up to sitting silently, staring into each other’s eyes and not saying a word. You will find yourself feeling deeply connected, fully seen, and smiling wildly.
Snuggling, Hugs And Holding Hands – sustained body contact increases the bonding hormone Oxytocin, and is a wonderful way to send love and compassion without needing to say a word. Snuggling, hugging, and holding hands all include sustained physical contact and will do the trick. Now, this is important. Everyone has different personal preferences when it comes to snuggles and hugs and holding hands. Everyone has an ideal amount. If you exceed the ideal amount, they will feel smothered. If they don’t get enough they will feel lacking. See if you can find each other’s ideal level of contact and fulfill it, without exceeding it.
Play and Flirt – ensuring that your partner feels your love and compassion doesn’t need to be so serious. Playing and flirting goes a long way. You might call it opportunistic harassment… with permission of course. For example, as your love walks by, you might reach out and touch them playfully. A playful poke, swipe or pat in a prime location, or a kiss on the head or hand when they least expect it shows them that they are on your mind and they are a priority. This is opportunistic attention, fund and joy. Love SHOULD be fun. So look for opportunities to play with light touch in this way.
Send Love – For an extra challenge, imagine sending love each time you look at your partner, and each time you touch them. Focus first on your heart when looking at or talking to them. Then imagine sending love through your gaze, or down your arm and through your fingers in your touch. Imagine love flowing from your heart, to them, riding like music on a radio wave. Note their reaction. When you hug them or snuggle them, send love. Engulf them in love. See what happens.
Count The Ways – A fun back and forth game is to tell your partner why you love them, and why they are amazing. Take turns telling each other about all your amazing traits, quirks, and attributes. Hearing that you are awesome never gets old. It makes you both feel wonderful.
Life and love should be fun. Come up with some other games of your own and enjoy this connection as it deepens.
